I have been working very hard to find a behavioral program that works in our house. I wanted to figure something out that reinforced the good and squished the bad behaviors, yet was simple enough that everyone (including daddy) could understand. In all my years of working with children I have been trained in 6 different behavioral programs, was a trainer in one and created one of my own. I still find myself, trying to figure out what works with my own children. I don’t want to crush their self-esteem, and still set very clear boundaries.
I have figured out something that is working (so far) and thought I would share it with all the other mama’s out there. In last months Family Fun magazine I read a small blurb about a mom that used marbles to encourage her kids to do chores around the house. This planted the seed for what has become our new marble program. I gathered up an old jelly jar for each of the kids and put their names on them. I painted Rayne’s top blue and Lexy’s pink. Then I found a large jar (for the community marbles). I bought a big box of marbles and filled up the big jar. The kids can earn marbles for any and everything….. cleaning up, sharing, waking up dry, using the potty, listening, really just any positive behavior. They can also loose marbles for any negative behaviors….. like talking back, hitting, not listening and so on. When the kids earn marbles they get to go get them out of the community jar (count them) and put them in their own jar. When the loose marbles they have to go and take them out of their jar and put them back in the big jar. Lexy HATES having to take marbles out of her jar!!! Each behavior (good or bad) has a price, since waking up dry was a big one for Lexy at first she would get 5 marbles for that, now the she is waking up dry almost every day I dropped it down to 3. Then at the end of the week (we are doing it Friday nights) they get to cash in (or bank) their marbles. I have a box of small tokens that cost from 10 marbles to an entire jar. I have small toys, popsicles (they can eat in the tub), walks with daddy around the neighborhood…..in the article I read the lady had older kids and she used money, date night with one parent.
I also let the kids pick out their own stuff to put in their prize box. I am very guilty of buying my kids “little stuff” when we go shopping, but now they know if they get something it goes right in the prize box and they will have to earn it with marbles (good behaviors). I’m sure this sounds very simple and silly, but it truly is working….. I will keep you posted as we progress. It’s also fun when you are out somewhere and you remind the kids “Don’t lose your marbles”…heeheehee
While I am here I will also give you a little update on what has been going on in the Gary house these days. We have really been in a good groove lately. We have swimming (with both kids) twice a week, speech (with Lexy) twice a week, and tumbling. We are also hoping to start occupational therapy with Lexy soon. The kids have made a lot of friends in the neighborhood, and we spend many hours outside playing and planting. We are growing a garden in our yard and go to the beach weekly Monty has plenty of work, but also has a few contractors working for him, so he has been able to spend a little more time at home. He is also playing in the little band at church and he is a real asset to it. I stay busy with gardening (my new found love), looking for fun cheap places for us to go, discount shopping and I am just learning the art of couponing…… boy can it save a lot of money. I have to earn my keep some way. . I am also trying to get organized to start homeschooling in the fall. Life is so so good, and we are grateful!!
