2008 Christmas letter

Dear Friends and Family,

Life just keeps getting better and better………

The year began with the birth of our healthy baby boy.  Rayne Michael Gary was born on February 3, four days before his due date and not a moment to soon. Rayne was 7 lbs 12 oz, handsome, healthy, and demanding.  He has stayed in the 95% in height and weight.   He brings us so much joy and stress.   He began walking at 8 ½ months old.  He is all boy and into everything.

Last year in March on my birthday I had no children and this year I had a newborn and a two year old to care for.  No time to feeling sorry for myself this year! 

We decided to stay in our home in Riverview, and list our St. Harbor house. Thankfully it sold in the beginning of June.  The computer business has been a bit slower this year as with everything.  I am staying home with the kids for now, and will probably go back to work when Lexy starts school.

The year ended with the adoption of Lexy.  Alexis Rose Gary was made a forever member of our family on (National Adoption Day) November 21.  We have considered Alexis our daughter since the day she came into our home, and now we have peace that she will always be our daughter.  She continues to have “stuff” that we have to learn how to handle, but we feel overjoyed to be the ones that get to take care of her everyday.

We have decided to stay a licensed foster home.  We are going try out taking emergency short term placements.  We are not ready for another long term or permanent placements, but we also weren’t ready to close our home.  Our plate is pretty full now so, we will just take it one day at a time and see what we can handle.

2008 has been an amazing year for our family.  We have been showered in blessings.   I can’t wait to see what 2009 has in store!

                                                    Peace, Love and Family!!

Hugs, Monty, Amanda, Lexy and Rayne Gary

Adoption Day

Today was our big day.  It's official we adopted Lexy.  She is now Alexis Rose Gary.  It was national adoption day and there was alot of festivities.  It was a joyous day for lots of families, and I felt honored to be a part of it.  I think Lexy was most excited about the new hair cut and dress she got for the occasion.  She kept telling people she was going to be "dotdid" and be a princess, she even told the judge that. For some reason she thought after she was adopted she was going to be a princess.  I guess in a way she is, she is our princess.

I can not put into words the weight that has been lifted off of us to know that Lexy is a FOREVER member of our family.  We have been her mom and dad since the day she came into our home and the fear I felt of having our child taken away is the scariest thing I have ever felt, and that fear is gone.  I have wonderful peace.  I even feel more prepared to handle some of the difficult behaviors she has been showing.

Alexis also had her Thanksgiving feast and her class preformed a song for the parents.  She wore her pilgrim hat and vest she made in class.  She was in the very front row and I think she sang the loudest of all of them.  In the chorus of the song the kids put their hands to their mouth shouted " Thank you Lord"!  I felt filled with emotion, I too wanted to shout THANK YOU LORD!!  Our prayers have been answered.  

Rayne also had his 9 month check up on Wednesday and had been walking for three weeks prior to it. He is now running! The Dr. was super impressed by his development and growth.  He is still in the 90 percent on height and weight, and right on track with the other tests.  He is a pretty happy boy, rotten but happy.  He loves music and dances and claps when he hears it.  He also loves to hear his daddy sing and bangs on the guitar while he is playing.  I feel certain that he is going to be a guitar player like Monty.

We are so blessed.  I can not thank everyone enough for all of the reference checks, fingerprinting, thoughts, prayers and continual support through this journey.  We are dancing in the light at the end of the tunnel.  THANK YOU!  THANK YOU!  THANK YOU!  I love you all.

Hugs,

Amanda (Monty, Alexis, and Rayne)

October 14, 2008

Everything with the adoption is going smoothly so far.  We have been busy getting our paper work completed, making sure our cats are up to date on shots, scheduling physicals on everyone in the family, and so on.  Our goal with our worker is to adopt Lexy on national adoption day which is November 15.  It is a big deal to adopt on this day, because the media comes, and they have some festivities.

Lexy has started in her new preschool.  She only attends part-time on M-W-F in the mornings.  I think she likes it.  She has had a little trouble getting back in the swing of the classroom and listening, but her teacher seems to enjoy having her and is working with her.  The last behavior that she was working on with Lexy was to get her to stop kissing everyone.....ha ha ha.  She is so affectionate, it hurts (literally it does).  She wants to love everyone to death, but I will take that over biting and pushing any day. 

Rayne is doing great too.  He is a monster, but he is so fun!!  He turned 8 months on the 3rd. He is into everything.  He gets himself stuck on, in, or under furniture several times a day.  He has been free standing for weeks, and tonight he took his first two unassisted steps. Clearly...  he is a genius!  He has four teeth and has just cut two more.

Mom and I have be brainstorming Halloween costumes, just when we though we had it figured out Lexy announced she wanted to be a butterfly instead of a princess.  She will be a butterfly and Rayne will be a caterpillar

Monty and I are great too!  He hasn't gone out for that pack of cigarettes, that he keeps telling people he is going to do.  As I say in every family update, we are still trying to balance it all, but we will probably be doing that until our kids move out. 

September 10, 2008

Update time again ...Lexy turned 3 on August 25^th and we had a garden birthday party for her at our neighborhood clubhouse.  We invited all of the kids from her summer pre-k boot camp.   We had a bug hunt, ate dirt desert, and played in the sprinkler. Everyone seemed to enjoy the party and thanks to the support of my family and Jackie it went off with out a hitch.  

Monty and I decided that Lexy really needs more peer interaction and decide to start her in a new preschool this year at the church we got married in.  She will go M-W-F from 8:30am – 12:30pm.  She just started today and the teacher seemed excited for her to start, she was particularly happy that she is potty trained.  It is hard for me to give up control and trust that others will love her as much as I do.  That not because I have it all figured out by all means, just that I love her so much.  I do know that it will be good for her and me both.  I will keep you posted, today is her first day.  Let's hope that she can keep her hands and teeth to herself. 

The adoption process is going well, no word from her biological father, so he has sealed his own fate.  We have begun the paperwork as some of you know because you have received references in the mail.  The worker seems to believe she will be adopted by Christmas if not before.  Our family could not ask for a better Christmas present!!  She has been our daughter since the day she came into our home and we can not wait to make it official.  She continues to take speech therapy twice a week and continues to make progress.

Rayne is still big and healthy he is cut teeth on the top and the bottom.  He is crawling all over the place and is standing and pulling up on furniture.  He is into everything!!!  I have to drag him out of the cat food about 5 times a day.  He is spoiled rotten! The Dr. believes he is going through early separation anxiety…..I know I know it sounds funny.  She said all babies go through it, but it doesn't usually happen until they are around one, she believes he is a little a head of the game developmentally and that may be why we are going through it now.  She said it usually last about two months, not a moment too soon J

August 7,2008

Rayne had his 6 month check up today and he weighted 20.6 lb.  He is still in 95% on weight and off the charts on height.  She seems to think he is ahead of the curve developmentally and was very pleased with his progress.  He is starting to crawl and get in to everything that is on the floor. He has cut his two bottom teeth.  He has two more just starting to break through another on the bottom and one on the top. He has had a runny nose and a hard time sleeping the last couple and the doctor thinks this could be because of his teeth. He is starting baby food and seems to enjoy it.  He really likes to eat in whatever form it comes in.  We have not run into anything he doesn't like yet.

Alexis is such a loving big sister, she knows what Rayne needs and is not afraid to tell you.  She has showed almost no signs of jealousy, and has never tried to intentionally hurt him.  She is enjoying preschool, and is dealing with the usual two year old stuff.  She has made huge strides in her speech the last few months, and has even learned how to "talk back".  She continues to be a little stubborn, but amazes us at how affectionate and in tune with others feelings she is. 

We were given the adoption home study to complete and assigned a new adoption case manager.  Tim (her bio father) is passed his 30 days appeal period.  The worker told us there is always the possibility that it wasn't correctly sent to the Attorney General's office, and as of right now it is not on appeal but to give it a little bit to make sure.  It still could be several months before the adoption is finalized, but we can handle that.  It has been a long journey and we are almost there.

I have begun planning Lexy's 3rd birthday party, and of course I am as excited as she is about it.  We are having a garden party with flowers and of course lots bugs!!  We are inviting her preschool friends.

The Gary home is full and happy, and still a little overwhelming at times.  We feel incredible blessed to have such healthy and BEAUTIFUL children.  Oh yeah and that once in a life time love we found.

Another update

We have made it past the 10 days that Alexis bio father had to prove that he was in fact having car trouble.  He has made no contact with the case worker, so they are moving towards terminating his rights and towards adoption for us.  This is WONDERFUL news for our family.  He still has the 30 days to appeal the termination, but is is my understanding that very few parents actually fight this and if they do it is extremely hard to turn over.  Yippee!!  We feel a huge weight off our shoulders and can not wait for it to be over.

Lexy is doing great in her pre-k boot camp, she is starting to try to make sentences.  It seems like she learns to say a new word everyday, and we are actually able to understand most of them now.  She is also doing great with potty training.  She still has accidents every now and then, but we feel we are on the home stretch.  She continues to be affectionate, sweet and stubborn, she may have learned that since she has been in our home.     We feel so blessed to be in her life and grow and learn with her.  She is an amazing little girl.

Rayne is still growing like a weed.  He was 19 lbs at his last Dr. appointment.  He stills seems to be satisfied with breastfeeding, so we are going to keep it up as long as we can.  He has grown in to a happy content little boy.  He may be a little spoiled to his mama, but much more laid back than we thought he would be.

Monty's home is St. Harbor sold and that is a tremendous load off.  We (Monty) no longer has to make the trips over there to maintain it.  Monty also bought a (newer) car, he got a VW Jetta wagon and is really enjoying driving it.

We are happy and healthy and thankful to have such a wonderful family and friends.

Trial Monday

The trial for Lexy's case is Monday morning at 9:30 am.  The case worker asked be to be there at 11:00 am to testify.  I will not be able to be in the trial except for the time I am testifying.   I will spare you all the details that have unfolded in the last weeks, but I do feel encouraged due to her dad's failure to complete his case plan.  Though I am still a little nervous about the grandparents.

Please keep Lexy and our family in you thoughts and prayers. 

I will send an update on Monday, as soon as I know anything.

Family news

Great News!

Monty closed on his house in Safety Harbor this morning.  It was a belated birthday present for him.

I also took Rayne in for his 4 month check up and he is just shy of 18 pounds.  He is still in 95% on height and weight, the Dr. just went on and on about how healthy and handsome he is.  She said he seems to be doing great on just breastmilk and she said to keep up the good work.  I have to admit I was hoping she would say to start cereal :).  His shots are never fun, but he recovered quickly.

Alexis was accepted into a pre-k boot camp for the summer, and received a partial scholarship because she is a foster child.  They help with behaviors and getting her prepared to be in a school setting. It is twice a week in the mornings.  It is at the same place she gets her speech therapy and they are wonderful.  They love Lexy and the director of the program adopted two children out of foster care, so they "get it". 

Court today

Alexis father did not show up, but did call and say he was having car trouble.  He will have to 10 days to show proof he really was having car trouble and the trial will be rescheduled.  Then he will still have 30 day to fight it.

I will keep you all posted.  Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers.  Please keep lifting us up!

I am so tired I did not sleep much last night and just want closure.  Hopefully soon.

Rayne's announcement note

Dear Family and Friends,

I am embarrassed in how long it has taken me to get these mailed out, but excited to finally send them and share our joyous news.  Rayne and I both had a pretty uneventful birth.  We went to the hospital around 6 pm Saturday evening and he was in my arms by 6 am (Super Bowl) Sunday morning.  I only had to push for 20 minutes before he was here.  I was able to leave the hospital a day early because we were both doing so well.  This was not a good indicator of how the next few months would go.  Rayne slept very little at night and cried most of the first two months of his life, this was exhausting for everyone in the house.  Monty and I have dove into parenthood head first and feel incredibly blessed, but it is taking us sometime to find a balance.  Rayne is big health boy, and is settling into a routine that everyone can live with.  I finally feel like I have my head above the water.  Lexy is doing great.  I am keeping her home with me and Rayne, since I have decided not to go back to work right away.  Her case is going to trial, but since the biological father has done very little on his case plan it looks like he is sealing his own fate.  We are trying not to let our guard down because it is far from a done deal, but we do feel encouraged.   Thanks for all you thoughts and prayers.

We love you,

Amanda (Monty, Lexy, and Rayne)